Broken English Spoken Perfectly

I always knew that Asians and Indians ( I managed to understand and stop being so culturally insensitive and I have to separate them now) are learning English from a fresh age, but I never could understand why they do not speak it property. 

Now, I think I have the answer. They have their own English, I do not know who came here and adapted it, this is what I have managed to realize so far. If you want to be able to communicate in Malaysia, this is how it goes: 

Normal Version                                              Malay

Do you speak (Bahasa Inggeris / Malay)       Are you fluent (English /                                                                                                                                                   Malay)?

Just a little.                                                       Little.

You’re very kind!                                             You Very Well!

Where are you from?                                       From Where?

Where do you live?                                        You Stay Where?

I’ve been learning Malay for 1 month              I Was Deepening Bahasa                                                                                                                                     Melayu For 1 Month Lah!

I have to go                                                      Had Departed 

Can You Say It Again?                                     Can You Repeat What                                                                                                                                             You Say That Was?

Can You Speak Slowly?                                   Can You Reduce the                                                                                                                                              speed of your speech?

What’s That Called In Malay?                          Is the Thing’s Name

Look!                                                                See!

I feel sick.                                                         I Feel Pain.